Purpose in the Process

Looking back, It seems I've spent much of my time waiting. Waiting to heal, waiting for things to get better, waiting for life to move on... and what I've found in the process is that it's almost always excruciatingly slow. There were times when I thought my situation would never change because it was taking so long. I've since learned that, yes, things do get better and, yes, life does eventually move on. More importantly, however, I've found that while I've been waiting, there's been a transformation happening.

After we've lived long enough, most of us recognize that when we look back on our mistakes, hardships, and bumps in the road... if we're willing to take a good look, we can see that we have, thankfully, learned something and grown in the process. We've learned more about ourselves, what we want and need in life, and what we value most, which helps us to change what we need to change, and make better decisions for the future. It seems, however, that this is most obvious after we've gone through hard times and are on steadier ground. Wouldn't it be helpful, instead, to recognize this while we're going through it? If we did, I think we would be more patient, calmer, and better able to see how we're growing and changing in the process. With this in mind I've been trying to be mindful of what I'm supposed to be learning while I'm waiting for things to happen, and what I should be doing in the meantime. The more I do this, the more I'm able to slow down, relax into the process, and watch as things become clear. I also remind myself that studies have shown that it takes a good three years (or more) for life to feel "normal" again after a crisis, trauma, or huge bump in the road. This is a long time! Or at least it feels like it in the moment.

So when we find ourselves in a rough season of life that seems to have no end in sight, it helps to remember to stop and consider what we might be learning in the process. When we stop, look around, and take in the big picture, we notice things we wouldn't have seen otherwise, and learn things that give us a different perspective. Most likely whatever it is that we're learning is preparing us for what's to come, and transforming us into who we are meant to be. Although it takes patience, it also brings a sense of peace that someone is looking out for us and making sure we're healed, comforted, loved, and ready to move on. As nature shows us, when caterpillars go into their cocoon they soon dissolve into a liquid state and their DNA rearranges itself completely. Then, when the time is right, they break out of the cocoon transformed into a beautiful butterfly. It's important to remind ourselves that it's okay, and even necessary at times, to stay in a cocoon for a while until we're ready. For when we emerge we will notice that, not only have we transformed like the caterpillar, but we too have grown wings...

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